Oats for Breakfast

Many people have expressed interest and concern with my newfound venture into Quakerism. Since its Sunday I figure that's as good a time as any to explain.
I haven't always been a religious, or even spiritual person. There was a long time I wasn't sure I believed anything at all. I was never an out-and-out Atheist, but I guess that made me Agnostic for a while. Growing up we only attended church for a few years, and it's the kind of church I now deem a "bad church," in that the majority of the congregation shows up every Sunday to see what everyone else is wearing and to talk about people behind their backs, then leave and go back to living their lives mostly in opposition to everything they just heard while openly judging others. I started occasionally attending a Methodist church with my parents when they joined a few years ago. I like it, and I like the fact that they have a feamle pastor--that the Methodist Church in general allows that. I was very excited by the fact that Kirby and I were able to be married by a female pastor. That had always been important to me and something I knew I wanted if I ever got married. When it comes to the personal relationship with God I've always felt women have a clearer and better understanding of that aspect of faith, precicely because of how God made women.

Prior to my parents joining that church, however, I had gone from being Agnostic to being a believer. I can't pinpoint what exactly caused that change. It wasn't a single event (that I can remember, anyway) but a gradual process. I started noticing things in my everyday life that I felt "proved" the existence of a God. Over time I began to be able to tease out Biblical teachings from the hypocritical politico-religion that surrounds the majority of Christianity today. I realized that just because the majority of Christians I talked to thought being gay was a sin didn't make it a sin, and it didn't mean that is what the Bible taught, for example. Most of the qualms I had about being a Christian were centered on my interactions with them, mostly from working Sundays at the Brentwood Starbucks for three years--sort of the center of Christian hypocracy. I also noticed that when I was in extreme distress and thought to pray, things happened--most notibly a peace swept over me, and I would calm down. Even if the situation didn't turn out like I wished, I felt better.

 Fast forward to January, and I was reading "The Wordy Shipmates" by Sarah Vowell. Quakers get a few mentions in the book even though it's mostly about the first Puritan settlers to America. I was curious to learn more about Quakers so I did a little looking around the internet. What I learned surprised me. In the six or so years that I had been internally examining my religious beliefs I had come to a pretty firm idea of what I believed and didn't believe. Quakers, for the most part, believe the same things. I didn't know that there was actualy a religion or denomination out there that held those beliefs. I bought a few books on Quaker teachings, history, theology and daily living. I'm not done reading them all, but what I've learned has really resonated with me.

I have not yet attended a Meeting. I want to learn a bit more and feel more comfortable with it myself before taking that plunge, and I also just haven't had the time. The next few weekends are very busy, but beginning in May our schedule opens up and I plan to start attending sometime in the near future. I've been trying to incorporate the teachings and lessons in my daily life, and the one I've found the most helpful is "waiting." Probably the most unique aspect of Quakerism is silent, unprogrammed worship and they encourage that daily, not just in Meeting on Sundays. Every night before bed I turn off the TV and lights and lay flat on my back (a position I can't fall asleep in) and "wait." The hardest part of this is clearing your mind, beacuse it's not a time to be alone with your thoughts. It's a time to be alone without your thoughts and with the Holy Spirit.

Before discussing the aspects of Quakerism I identify with, let me clear up some misconceptions about what its not. Quakerism isn't like Amish or Mennonite. I think the confusion on that comes from historical representations of Quakers in traditional "Quaker dress" (like the Quaker Oats guy) that look like Amish or Puritians. Early Quakers also promoted living somewhat apart from larger society, but that evolved over time as they began realizing the importance of interacting with people of different faiths. Most Quakers today don't dress "funny" anymore, although plain dress is considered a virtue but what defines plain dress varies widely. Grey was a traditional color for Quakers and during the fight for the abolition of slavery many Quakers wore only undied clothes because most dye was the product of slave labor. The way I interpret plain dress in today's modern society is not dressing bland, but dressing modestly and not so extravagant as to overwhelm the person or to try and show status or elevate yourself above others. Quakers also embrace simplicty as a value, which goes hand in hand. Quakers are not opposed to having money or having things. In the extreme, and in the past, some Quakers have lived very simply with just the bare minimum, but Quakers have also been very successful businesspeople and they support the ability to create businesses and make money in the world. But they oppose excess and believing that having wealth makes you better than someone who does not. Modern Quakerism isn't opposed to luxury in and of itself, but within reason and limits that are fairly open ended. Much of it goes back to "letting your life speak" which is explained further below.

Quakers are Christian. They believe in God, Jesus Christ risen, and the Holy Spirit. they derive teachings from the Bible. Reasons they have been considered non-Christian usually have to do with their view of Original Sin (that it does not exist), the path to Salvation (internal, between the individual and God) and because of their view of Scripture (it is not the final word of God). These are all matters of interpretation that alot of people disagree with, I know. But I believe in these things, and so it made Quakerism a good fit for me personally. As for the interpretation of Original Sin, they do not believe that we are born with sin. I believe that. I find it hard to believe that an infant, who has had no real thoughts or experiences can have sin because sin is a combination of actions and thoughts. That is different from saying that we are sinners. In Eden, before Eve at the apple, man was free from sin because he had no capacity to sin. Once Eve ate the apple, I don't think it means that we were all automatically branded with sin, but were given the capability to sin. It is our actions and thoughts that can be sinful. So, just because Quakers do not believe in the traditional view of Original Sin does not mean they don't believe in sin at all, or man's ability to sin, or the need to repent for those sins. They just recognize that it is in our nature to sin, but it is not an automatic given of being alive. Original Sin is the change in the nature of man that makes sin possible.


Now, the aspects of Quakerism that appeal most to me are:


1. Waiting: I've always found value in trying to discern what God wants me to take away from a situation, day, feeling, etc... Being able to do that on a regular basis is great. Sometimes I "hear" nothing. Sometimes, even when I hear nothing I still leave the time with different feelings. God doesn't always put a flashing sign out for you.


2. Letting Your Life Speak: Quakers believe that you live your faith every minute of every day. If you do or say something that is contrary to that, you have done something very bad. But if you set an example for others by always doing what is right you show others the value of faith, and of doing good works, not by trying to convince them verbally, but by just doing. As I mentioned, hypocritical Christians have always posed a problem for me. The fact that DOING, not SAYING is the key for Quakers impresses me to no end. Its not about going to church every Sunday and Wednesday, and Sunday School and being part of the Ladies' Group and volunteering in the nursery and saying you believe. Its about believing, and then living that belief consistently.


3. Plain Speech/Truth: Plain speech is harder. Not using analogies or comparisons is virtually impossible for someone who wasn't raised Quaker. I'm not sure I'll ever get to that point, mostly because the writer inside me feels that they are sometimes necessary. For example, a "good" Quaker would never say "I'm starving," only "I'm hungry," because the truth is that you are not, in fact, starving. To say so is a lie in their eyes. But always speaking the truth, and not speaking at all when you feel that you cannot speak the truth for whatever reason is the way to go. People have called be "blunt," or "a bitch" or "rude" or any other type name in the past because I'm not always sensitive to people's feelings when it comes to giving my thoughts or opinions. Quakers think this is okay. The intent is not malicious, and if it is, you must rethink what you are going to say. But if you are hoenstly, from deep within, speaking what you believe to be the truth, then that is the right (and only) thing to say.


4. Equality/Inner Light: All people are the children of God. Each and every one of us. Even the bad or mean ones. Even the evil ones. Bad and evil people are not following God's teachings and they are ignoring the "Inner Light," but they are children of God, regardless. I've also always believed this to be true. Each and every person is entitled to a basic level of dignity and respect. God may have given us all different talents and abilities, and it is up to us to listen to the Holy Spirit to determine what those are and how best to use them. But being different doesn't make something "wrong" or "bad." The "Inner Light" is the Holy Spirit that resided inside of all of us, and we all have access to it and its guidance at any time. Quakers were the first to believe this, and at the time it was considered heretical, though most modern Christian denominations now support some form of this. Before the Holy Spirit was thought of as only an external thing, not something that resides in the soul of every person. Seeking outside guidance is okay, but we are all endowed with the ability to seek God's guidance on our own, with no outside support or interpretation.


5. Experiential Fiath/Continuing Revelation: Quakers believe that the Bible is not the FINAL word of God. I agree. It is a book that was written at a certain period of time about the revelations that were presented to those people, at that time. God has not stopped "talking" to people since then, and revelation of God's wisdom and desire is ongoing and constant. Things you experience in your daily life, witness or derive from Waiting are just as valid and important as anything written in the Bible. The Bible is the foundation, not the walls. Every time a baby is born, the miricle of new life and creation is seen and experienced. Every time someone dies the passing of the soul is felt. Grief, challenges, happiness, beauty, love, etc... are all God-given experiences that we must savor and learn from and continue to grow. There is no love without God, for His love is the ultimate love and the example of "perfect love" that we all strive toward. There is no forgiveness without Jesus Christ, for it was his crucifixion and death, and subsequent resurrection that gave forgiveness to all. To forgive, as God forgave, is the example set for all people in forgiveness, and it is not possible without Christ. I've long felt that Forgiveness is the hardest commandment of all. If the goal is to live as God desires and to live a Christlike life, forgiveness is the "trap," so to speak. I do not believe that is a skill or ability that God gave humans independently, and I've come to that conclusion through experience. True and absolute Christlike forgiveness is absolutely impossible for humans to achieve without asking for help from Him. I've personally never once been able to fogive fully without asking for Devine help. But each time I do ask, and that help comes, I'm living an experiential faith and seeing God's teachings revealed to me just as much as Moses did when he saw the burning bush. Again, there's not always a flashing sign to point it out to you. You have to notice.


To sum it up, I wasn't seeking a religion or denomination. I didn't throw darts at a dart board, picking whatever it hit. I stumbled upon (or was led, in an experiential fashion) to a denomination that already embodied the beliefs I had come to on my own. That in and of itself lends credence, in my opinion, to my beliefs because it is the heart of Quakerism that you hold your faith within, first and foremost, and I was already doing that. I was led, through a series of seemingly innocous events, to look into it. I didn't find Quakerism, it found me.