Playing Catch-Up

It has been quite a while since I blogged.  We were so busy, working literally around the clock, the last two weeks at the shop I just couldn't find the time or when I did find the time I was braindead.  So...here's a quick assortment from the last few weeks:

Chicago vs. Philly for the Stanley Cup.  Really?  Boo.  Game #1 is tonight and all I can say is I'm hoping for a resurrection of the Broad Street Bullies.  What an epic collapse on the part of San Jose.  That, I think, is the most shocking series this year--even more so than the collapse of the Caps.

We worked our asses off and still didn't make the deadline for the show.  Shit happens.  Took me two whole days of sleeping to recover from the 5-day run there at the end.  The car will be spectacular when its done, though, and I learned just how far I can push myself before going insane.  It is truly strange what yur body and mind does after that amount of time with no sleep.  The third day is the best because you actually get a little high.  The fourth day is the hardest because any time you stop you pass out.  So you have to keep occupied every second which can be more difficult than it seems.  I cleaned the hell out of the Charger though.  My Sonic Scrubber really came in handy!  A big shout out to our guys and their families who sacrificed so much to help!  And also to Mom and Dad who busted their asses, too, to help!  Not to mention a few select friends who pitched in.  All you guys rock!

Did a little shopping for my upcoming birthday this week.  I really think I was meant to be born super-rich because the one thing I'm truly good at and that brings me the most pleasure is shopping.  Since I'm not super-rich I have worked to develop a highly sharpened deal-o-meter.  I never pay full price for anything and can spend hours seeking out the best deal.  Due to my extreme dislike of actual people I prefer to shop online, but I've found that makes the shopping compulsion worse because you have literally unlimited options and can compare things across a braod range of stores, some that might not even exist in your town.  Sometimes I'll browse online and then go out and buy the item in persn, but only after extensive online research.  I've got this thing honed down to a science.  Or sport.  I prefer sport.  Shopping is my sport.

My pepper plants not only survived but have started sprouting peppers.  I'm so proud!  A few are almost ready to be picked and I can't wait to see what they taste like.  I lost the cilantro plant to a weed and one pepper plant to bugs, but I still have basil, chives, parsley, leeks and 5 peppers.  On Monday I plan to FINALLY plant the garden at the shop.  Its a good think I haven't planted it yet because of all the rain.  Had I planted it when originally planned it would have washed away in the flooding.

We are going out tonight to celebrate my birthday (a week early).  We are going to Knoxville for Kirby's hockey tournament next weekend, on my actualy birthday, and I plan to par-tay down with Cheryl Saturday night.  So, we are doing my birthday dinner with the parents tonight at Lime.  I'm looking forward to a pitcher of sangria or two.  Since I'm NOT getting to go to D.C. for my birthday this year as originally planned, I still wanted some sangria!  We'll see if the nice folks at Lime can compete with the sangria masters at La Tasca.  I have hope!  Then we are going out to Red Door East for a bit.  Due to my lack of time to plan and this being a holiday weekend, not many people could make it out but that's fine.  I'm not a huge fan of birthday (or other) get togethers with tons of people because you can't socilaize with that many people anyway.  Not in any quality way.  We haven't done anything for my birthday the last two years, so I'm ready to do it up big time, across two weekends and in two cities, this year!  I'm finally "getting old" so this might be my last big throw-down!  For a while anyway!

And speaking of my birthday, I can cross one thing off my "Bucket List."  You see, Kirby is not the best gift giver.  I have to give him kudos for creativity with the first birthday of mine we celebrated together, since he had known me just over a month.  Even though I have not yet had the opportunity to USE what he got me yet, it was a really nice thought and showed he was actually listening to me when we talked about things.  (It was hockey pads...I said I wanted to learn how to skate and play hockey, and it would be nice to have the pasd when learning to skate so it wouldn't hurt when I fell...but we still to this day have not gone ice skating for him to teach me!)  But on the whole he just isn't good at coming up with ideas--not just for me, but for everyone--occasionally he has a good idea like painting the ghost flames on my Dad's motorcycle helmet for Christmas last year, but for the majrotiy of gift-giving occasions I'm the one who comes up with the idea and does the shopping.  Which kinda sucks when it's my turn to get a gift.  :)  He asked me the other night what I wanted and I said I really didn't know.  I didn't know.  I hadn't given it much thought yet.  He never has time to shop, anyway.  Well, yesterday someone sent me a link to a bunch of Manolos a stylist was selling on eBay.  For cheap.  Serious cheap.  There was only one pair in my size and they were leopard print, which I LOVE.  So I asked him if I could bid on them for my present and he agreed.  I WON THE SUCKERS!!!  So...I can cross "own a pair of Manolos" off my list now!  Best part is...we got them for 1/8th the retail price, so not only did I accomplish an item on my list, I accomplished it at significant savings!  Go me!  I told you shopping was my sport!   

I'm back to being a blonde again.  Last appointment we got it fairly blonde but yesterday we got it all the way back.  I had to go blonde again because I wanted to see what I thought about it AFTER having been a brunette for a little while.  I'm really kind of stuck.  When my hair was brown I preferred the way it looked blonde, in pictures, since that was my reference point.  Now that its blonde again I prefer it brunette, but in person.  I've always thought I don't really look like myself in pictures--I guess that's called being unphotogenic--but I've always felt a disconnect between what I see of myself in pictures versus real life.  So, I prefer being blonde in a picture, but brunette in person.  I also think I look better in pictures with my contacts in but silly in person without my glasses.  That was the issue with my nose, too.  I never thought my nose was THAT BIG in person but in pictures it always looked HUGE to me.  Fortunately, since that was a drastic move on my part and not cheap either, I like the way my nose looks now both in person and in pictures.  It could still be a tad smaller, in a perfect world, but it also seems to fluctuate in size now.  Strange, I know, but there are days when it seems bigger at the tip than others and I think it has to do with internal swelling from allergies and sinusitis since the days where I'm most congested my nose looks bigger and when I'm not congested (like, never) it seems smaller.  Go figure.

I'm done with acupuncture for the time being, and the overall result has been positive.  Some of the issues haven't really changed much but I have noticed some improvement in my overall energy level and IBS.  I haven't noticed any change in my allergies or sinusitis.  The knot in my back is completely gone, but my neck and back are not completely pain free.  It is a noticable improvement though.  The one thing that is the most shocking is that I have been 100% migraine free since my first appointment.  My main triggers--stress and lack of sleep--have been present in abundance over the last month, so I should have been getting them with some regularity, but I have not.  It is truly a miracle because I have gone 13 years looking for a solution to my migraines, and this has been in so far!

That about wraps up the last few weeks.  Hopefully I can get back on schedule with this thing now, and with my life in general.  We have a few weeks that are going to be pretty laid back, in comparison, and then the car show schedule kicks up in July, so I'm sure we'll be busy with that.  I should have some interesting observations from the shows, though, since it will be our first time going to most of these and some are pretty big national shows.  Not to mention any time Kirby and I travel together, there's always some adventure involved! 

Hockey Thoughts: Conference Finals

Haven't blogged much lately because all I've been doing is working.  I haven't had much time to do anything else, including eating and sleeping.  As a result I haven't been able to follow the last round of the Playoffs as closely as I'd have liked.  In fact, I didn't see one single game all the way through, and mostly got my info from On the Fly every night before bed or in the morning--or some combination.  I did see the end of the final San Jose vs. Detroit game, but that's about it.  I tried watching the Flyers vs. Bruins tonight, but fell asleep, as I did attempting to watch the Habs vs. Pens a few nights ago.

Anyway, the results are in and what an interesting turn of events we have.  No spoilers in the West necessarily as we end up with the #1 and #2 seeds playing each other.  The East, on the other hand, was a whole mess of surprises with the Habs pulling TWO series out of their asses through 7 games.  First they knock off the league leading Capitals, then take out the defending Cup Champion Pens.  What a story this has been for those guys!  The Flyers also shocked a bit making it past the first round, but particularly after pulling out of this series after falling 3-0 against the Bruins.  That requires 4 straight wins, both at home and on the road and is statistically almost impossible.  In my opinion, it was even more interesting considering the Bruins aren't that spectacular and had enough trouble getting out of the first round themselves.  To go up 3-0 in the series was a stunner in and of itself.  To fall that badly makes me not feel *quite* as bad about the Caps collapse.  This leaves us with the exact opposite of the West, with the #7 and #8 seeds facing off for the Conference title.

Back in the West I'm not sure what to make of that final matchup.  I think the Sharks have learned the lessons they needed to learn from last year, and all throughout these series, and I just have a hunch they will make it through to the Finals.  As for the East, I think the Habs are just on fire, and even though both teams have a great underdog story, I don't think the Habs had to work nearly as hard to make it happen as the Flyers did.  I'm going with the Habs in that series, and I'm going to stick with them through the Finals if they do advance.  Even though they took out my precious Caps, the Caps did more to beat themselves than anything else.  Plus, if Nashville ever makes a deep Playoff run it will be more akin to what the Habs have accomplished this year than anything else.  Its not like they will ever be the favorites or enter the Playoffs as a high seed. 

Regardless of who makes it through on either side, there will be a major mismatch once the Finals come.  Without knowing how this round turns out its impossible to weigh in on the emotional toll the teams will have been through.  But for either the Habs or the Flyers to have to play either the Hawks or the Sharks is going to be really interesting--just can't call yet if it will be interesting in a good or bad way.  I do think that the Habs would have the best chance of seeing it through, as they had to face two of the hardest teams to get where they are and the Flyers played two mediocre teams that were inconsistent at best and did not play according to their regular season pattern. 

So, in sum, I'm rooting for the Habs all the way and the Sharks in the West.  I will still miss the first several games in this series, but by the end of the week things will be back to normal and I'll be able to catch the end of both series, as well as all the Finals games.  Not to mention get to sleep and enjoy other activities which lead to blogs of a more interesting nature.

Thoughts on the Inside of my Dash

In traffic today I noticed the massive amount of pollen that had accumulated inside my Jeep.  See, it has a leak in the cowl that we are going to fix eventually...whenever we eventually get around to painting it.  The rocket scientists at Chrysler made it so you cannot access the cowl without cutting into it, so...it has to wait until the right time.  Anyway, my Jeep leaks when it rains either hard or long or both.  As it has done here recently, so I had a few inches of rain in there.  I just wipe it up and let it dry out by keeping he windows down while its parked all day.  That, coupled with the mutant amounts of pollen here this spring led to what can only be described as a disgusting and revolting amount of pollen on the inside of my car.  Driving around started to literally make me sick.

I had a container of the new scrubby Clorox or Lysol or whatever brand wipes in my car.  When I was sitting at a light I'd grab one and start wiping everything within reach.  All the cracks and crevices were just coming out nasty.  Most of those parts had been taken off when we rebuilt it and I cleaned them a little but nothing spectacular.  When I got back to the shop I just really wanted to clean the inside of my AC vents.  There was like 1/4" of dust and pollen in there, and having them blowing has got to be the main cluprit.  I knew my dash was easy to take apart, so I'd just take those two side panels off, clean in there and be done.  

I see one screw.  I go get the screwdriver.  I remove the one screw.  I pull.  Nothing.  

I get the plastic thingy that Kirby uses to pull panels off.  I pull the panel back.  Another screw.  Great.  I can't reach that screw without taking off the panel next to it.  OK, where's the screw for that one.  There it is.  Take that screw out, and the other three holding that panel on.  Take it off.  Go back to the original hidden screw.  Take it out.  Pull.  Nothing.  Oh crap.  Another hidden screw.  That thing is put together like a jigsaw puzzle.  On to the next screw.  Why isn't it turning.  Oh, hell.  Its a bolt.  Where's the ratchet.  That ratchet doesn't fit.  Go grab another one.  That one doesn't fit.  Grab the whole tray full of wratchets.  Next screw.  The screwdrive is too long, where's the short one.  Next screw.  That one is too short, where's the really long one?  Next thing I knew my entire dash was taken apart.  Every last peice.  

Seriously, if you ever get the urge to do this yourself...don't.  Five hours later I finally got it all put back together but I had a few screws left over so I'll have to revisit the project in the daylight.  But, since I had the entire damned thing open I got in there and scrubbed ALL that pollen out.  I took the panels inside and washed the backs of them.  I'm actually ashamed at how dirty it was back there, even though alot of that grime was 10 years in the making.  I've only had it a year, so only 1/11th of it was my fault.  I urge you to take it to a professional for cleaning if you really feel the need to clean it.  I am not one of those professionals.  

Dear Mom

I can't really say if you were a good mother to me as a baby because I can't remember.  But I can guess you might have been, since I never slept and you didn't ditch me in a dumpster somewhere.  You didn't get mad when I said "damn" when I was about 2 or 3, because I immediately started crying since I knew I had done something wrong.  I actually remember that happening, believe it or not.  You just laughed at me.  I don't remember the Barbie incident at the mall, but today I understand the value of a threat on which you follow through--its called a promise.  I now respect wooden spoons and can't cook with one without thinking of ass whoopins.  Don't even get me started on Castoria. 


You put up with lots of stuff from me growing up.  Like my obsession with keeping the parsley garnish every time we went out to eat.  What was with that?  I still remember you telling me to put it in your purse, and that when I did your purse smelled like lipstick and Kleenex.  How annoying was that to have to dig it out and throw it away every time?  You put up with the fact that I have always been one of the pickiest eaters and I'm really glad you never did make "shit rolled in oats and fried" when you were frustrated with my eating habits.  Dad probably thanks you too.


Because it was just me, and you couldn't be with me every second of the day, you taught me to be able to happily play alone.  Is that why I had so many Barbies?  Today my desire to be alone is both a blessing and a curse, but I'm still very glad I can be alone for extended periods of time without going crazy.  You let me learn how to have fun even without access to toys, not getting annoyed when I wanted to keep large boxes Dad brought home, for weeks at a time turning them from houses into cars into forts into who knows what.  You consistently delt with my screaming for you in the middle of the night when I'd roll off my bed and into my nightstand.  What about that time for a full year when I refused to sleep in my bed, instead sleeping on the floor in a sleeping bag?  Or when I did return to my bed but insisted on having every spare pillow in the house piled on top of it, 2-3 feet above where the bed should have been?  Are you sure I wasn't mentally impared as a child? 


You gave me more leeway with television that most parents did at the time.  I had a TV in my room at a young age.  Back then all I watched was Nick at Night, and even though I'm sure this contributed to my current TV addiction, I got to experience so many shows that most people of my generation never did.  Green Acres, Mr. Ed, Dobie Gillis, Donna Reed, Dick Van Dyke, My Favorite Martian...the list goes on and on.  Later, you didn't care that I watched Ren and Stimpy or Beevis and Butthead.  You barely flinched when I watched Terminator 2 at age nine, and never objected to me reading "adult" books like Stephen King and Michael Crichton before I was even an adolescent.  I'm not certain, but I think I moved on from those books when I was 13.  You simply recognized that some of the subject matter may have been above my head, but my reading level and comprehension was such that being forced to read James and the Giant Peach would have bored me to death.  Besides, I had read that years prior.  You were always proud of my reading skills and interest in books.   


You taught me the value of family, letting me spend a week every summer at Nan's.  I think you understood the value of being in that atmosphere, too, helping out in the garden and being out of the "city."  You let me spend the afternoon with Dadaus, even though you knew she was letting me eat straight brown sugar by the bowlful.  You wanted me to experience some of the things you had as a child, and I'm sure none of us will ever forget you spraying mud out of mine and Zach's butt cracks with the water hose after we played in the mud.  Those are the experiences and memories that last a lifetime and are priceless no matter how silly or minor they seemed at the time.  You might have known I would grow up to love cooking with as many "meals" as I made with subpar vegetables from the garden, weeds, rocks, mud and sticks.


Even though I now know that you gave me Benadryl every night to make me go to sleep (not because of my mosquito bites), you let me play outside every night until dark, or even past, in the summer.  Riding bikes, swimming and having lemonade stands.  Or even waiting out by the road all day for New Kids on the Block to come by.  You didn't tell us they wouldn't.  You let us do it even though it was quite possibly the dumbest thing ever.  You laughed at me again when I tried to be Pee Wee Herman but fell asleep with my face all taped up with Scotch Tape.  You handled yourself well when I found my Easter candy in the closet, and my teeth in that box by your bed.  From the time I was little you knew you had a nosy little twit on your hands!  You let me play with glitter and melt crayons on the lightbulb in my toy closet.  You let me draw on the walls in my bedroom closet and even consented to my drastic room redcoration in middle and high school.  First dark teal, then bright ass blue.  You didn't say a word when I basically wallpapered the walls with posters and pictures and everything else.  Then you pulled all the staples out one by one when I moved out, and had a sense of humor about the hole in the door I had been hiding for years with a poster.


You never made me play sports.  You never made me be in beauty pagents or be a cheerleader.  You never made me do chores (probably not the best idea, in hindsight!).  You just supported me in the things I wanted to do, like helping me bake the 1st Place winning corn muffins for 4-H.  You let me go to 4-H camp, even though you knew it made me miserable for the first two days, because you know by the end of the week I wouldn't want to come home.  I'm sorry for that terrible letter I sent you that one time.  :)


Then I got a little older.  It seemed like you made me do everything I didn't want to and for no good reason at all.  Other than just being a mean bitch who wanted to ruin my life.  You made me come home by cerfew.  You made me concentrate on my homework and get good grades.  You made me get a job when I started driving.  You made me pay for the mistakes I made so often then.  I dressed funny and dyed my hair crazy colors, but you knew I'd grow out of it.  I had a different bozo boyfriend almost every month it seemed, and you dealt with that even when my Homecoming date had lime green hair and went by "Germ."  You made me behave, even though you didn't think it was working.  Sure, I snuck around and did things I shouldn't have but always in the back of my mind I knew I had to make good decisions and stay out of *major* trouble.  I didn't want to disappoint you or Dad.  I really didn't, even though many of the things I said and did from the ages of 16 to 18 seemed to show otherwise.  I'm not sure there is a greater challenge on planet Earth than dealing with a teenage GIRL.  Thinking back on some of the things I said to you at that time, I would have killed me if I had been you.  I don't even like to think about it today because its embarassing and I'm ashamed and please know that I am sorry.  But there's something about the mind of a teenage girl that can't see what good her mother is trying to do for her, and God's punishment for that is that just a few short years down the road you do finally understand.  Then you have to turn around and say, "You know what Mom?  You were actually right.  About everything."  I honestly believe that if I ever do have a child it will be a girl, because that is the only way God can make me truly atone for my sins as a teenager--to have to raise a teenage daughter myself.  I can only pray that you will still be around to watch, and laugh and say, "I TOLD YOU SO!!!"  That would be your reward!


You allowed me to take a semester off in college, even though you wanted desperately for me to finish and succeed.  I think deep down you knew that working 40 hours a week at Starbucks would show me pretty quickly that I didn't want to do that for the rest of my life--that paying your bills and actually getting by wouldn't be easy, and partying all the time and not going to school wasn't going to be as fun as I expected.  You were right.


By the time I graduated from Belmont in 2004 I think you realized you had done a decent enough job of raising me.  We took that trip to Gulf Shores with Becky and Andi, Pam and Ashley.  I think we bonded as two adult women for the first time on that trip.  Then I broke your heart by moving to D.C. and planning to build my future there.  I know you knew it was for the best and I had to find my own way, but I know how worried you were and how hard it was to let me go.  Again, you knew what you were doing because that city and that career wasn't really for me.  And when I finally had distance between us I realized I didn't want it there.  I realized that you, and Dad, were the only parents I had or would ever have, and I really did want to stay close to home.  Some people might say that's not the best idea, and many people live their entire adult lives far away from parents that they do care about and love.  You can have a good relationship with your parents and live far away.  Each person has their own deal and can choose what they wish.  I chose to come home, and part of that decision I think, was formed by watching your great relationship with your mother my whole life.  In that regard you truly taught me by example, and I'm greatful.


So I came home.  I was completely done with school, but didn't know yet what I wanted to do with my life.  I spent a year just kind of stuck in the same place trying to figure it out.  You never told me what to do.  You barely even gave me advice.  You just listened and supported me and let me know that no matter what I decided, you'd be there.  I eventually made some major changes in my life, and sure enough, you were right there.  You helped me pick out my house.  You helped me move into the new house and get it situated.  You even come over and clean my house when I'm too busy and/or tired to deal with it myself.  You always clean my toilets because you know I just won't.  You were nice and welcoming to the new guy I brought around, even though I hadn't been out of my last relationship long.  I know as quickly as we met and fell for each other it could have seemed like a bad idea, but you never once said anything or treated him anything but warmly.  You, and everyone else, welcomed him right into the family.


You didn't bat an eye when I said I was going to quit my job and work with him.  You might have been shocked, but not surprised, when I told you we decided to get married.  You gave us your ring for me to wear, and every time I look at it I still think of you (and Dad and your successful 30 years together) and hope someday I may have a daughter I can pass it along to, as well.  It may not be "the ring of my dreams" and I may not wear it as my engagement ring forever, but it is more meaningful than anything else we could have had at the time--or now.  It showed me that you truly approved of our decision, and being able to have a family ring that is so beautiful, is all part of what a true marriage is about.


You helped me plan my wedding without being overbearing and scary like some mothers-of-the-bride can be.  You dealt with the tight schedule and listened to what I wanted and helped make it happen.  You beamed with happiness when I tried my dress on for the first time and we both knew it was perfect.  As excited as I was, I think you were more.  You ordered those cute little napkins even though I didn't ask for them.  When my wedding day came you didn't mind that I needed a Xanax and a cigarette to calm down.  You just drove me to the church, did my hair and laced me up in my perfect dress.  You even buckled my shoes because I couldn't bend down.  Ultimately I think you were more nervous than I was, but you put the fear into Danny and he got my groom to the church on time!  I'm sure a mother watching her daughter get married is a completely different exprience than a dad watching the same event.  You were honestly happy for me--for us--that day, and helped it all go off without a hitch!


In the 21 months (to the day) since I've been married you have continued to be a great mother to me, but also a great mother-in-law.  I am so grateful that you love Kirby, and he loves you, and that we've continuted to have a great relationship now that I have a "family" of my own to take care of.  Both you and Dad have brought him into our family and treat him as if he were your own son.  You've helped us at home, around the shop, and been there for us during good times and bad.  We've also gone through alot as a family in that time, and even the bad or rough times I look back on fondly for the positive effects they've had on our lives.  Most recently, last weekend, you went to shore up the shop against the flood while we were gone and went back the next day to clean up the small mess that was left behind, despite being as terrified as we were of what you might find there.


Over the last two months I've also had the life-changing experience of watching you take care of your own mother, helping her rehabilitate after her surgery, at a great personal expense.  It made me face things I did not yet want to--such as what will I do, or how will I handle doing the same when my time comes?  I can only hope to do as good a job as you have done, and with such composure and grace as you have.  I'm betting you hope the same!  But after all we've been through and all you have done for me you've "earned your keep" in that regard!  I promise I'll do my best and not let your wheelchair roll out into traffic!

For all the good times and bad, big things and small, you've had a profound impact on who I am today.  I hope you are proud of who that is, even with some of my oddities (we'll call them).  I hope you can see the areas of my life and personality that you influenced--like my stubbornenss, independence, intelligence, cooking skills (but not baking!), propensity to laugh at inappropriate times and my skillfully honed "stink eye."  Of course there are areas in which we couldn't be more opposite--my inability to clean anything, extreme dislike of hot weather and outdoor activities, the willingness to leave the house without makeup, or the ability to occasionally root for the Red Wings when the circumstances demand.  And even though no one is 100% perfect you've been about as perfect a mother as anyone could ask for.  I know I probably don't express my appreciation enough, and you've spent the last 28 years of your life trying to make mine better.  But I hope you know how much I appreciate you simply because I haven't ditched you in a dumpster somewhere!  

I also hope you haven't had a "Bo Duke Breakdown" while reading this.  Happy Mother's Day Mom!!!

Tennessee--It Is Time To Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is

Please do not take this post the wrong way.  I have immense sympathy for everyone in the Nashville area who has been affected by the floods, and some of our family and close friends fall into that category.  The entire city is devistated and it will take an endless amount of money, work and support to return to normal.  However, when hypocracy slaps me in the face I can't help but speak up.


I'm sure the majority of Tennesseans are "conservative," and many likely sympathize with the so-called Tea Party Movement.  Some individuals I know for a fact that are "Tea Partiers," who oppose federal intervention and programs ("hand outs") and who tout the power of the private sector and free-market to solve all social ills have expressed outrage over the fact that Tennessee has been "ignored."  Either by the federal government or the national media.  The case against the national media is a much easier one to make.  But those wailing and moaning about the lack of federal support are the ones that are really getting up in my craw right now.


Either you mean what you say, and believe what you claim to believe or you don't.  And if you don't that makes you a hypocrite.  So far, Nashville has done a bang-up job taking care of this problem on our own.  Like the blog at Section 303 (Nashville Predators fans) today pointed out, there was no looting or crime spree that followed this flood.  Just an outpouring of support.  I went with Kirby today to his sister's neighborhood, which was badly flooded this weekend.  Her entire block was lined with cars and people doing what needed to be done and helping each other out.  No one was running down the street stealing things or shooting people.  And no one was sitting around asking where FEMA was.  She lives in a very nice neighborhood, and most people don't come to be able to afford such a nice home sitting around their whole lives waiting for someone to help them out.  That's just a fact.  I'm not saying that all poor people are lazy, and that all wealthier people are go-getters, but the fact reamins that the large majority of middle and upper-middle class people in America got to be that way because they worked hard.  Sure, they might have been born into a family that was well-off which gave them an advantage from the start.  But they could have ended up homeless, just like anyone else, if they had taken life's opportunities for granted and not worked hard to make a good life for themselves and their families.

But my main point remains the same.  You cannot decry the federal government intervening in situations, spending levels through the roof, etc... then turn around and beg and cry when you need "help."  You just can't.  Today is the day to decide where you stand.  If you walk the walk instead of just talking the talk and you want to volunteer, contact people you know or local churches or other groups.  DO NOT, and I repeat do not, go through Hands on Nashville.  That is the group that will be collecting and distributing federal money once they decide what to give Nashville, and the number of volunteers registered with HON will contribute to that total.  Where do you think that money will come from?  From our national debt, that's where.

Now, I hate to politicize a disaster, especially one in my own back yard.  But it will be done regardless of what I say and type here.  Do you not think Democrats will point out the hypocracy come the election this year.  If you think they are too sensitive to do something like that, think again.  They will say and do whatever it takes to destroy their opposition, and that includes exploiting a tradegy.  So, why not turn this disaster into one of the biggest political statements of all time--against federal intervention and funding by showing how its done without it!?  To date we've done a dandy job.  People are spreading the word and getting out to help.  Today Lowes came by and handed out cases of bottles water to the people working in my sister-in-law's neighborhood.  Harris Teeter is also giving out free water.  Despite Home Depot gouging people for "assembly," the local business community is stepping up to the plate.  So many people have contacted us to see how they can help.  If you can physically help, do.  If you want to donate, go buy Home Depot and Lowes and Wal Mart and Target, etc... gift cards and hand them out to people who need them.  Donate used items to the shelters and local churches.  Loan your shop vac to a neighbor.  Watch a pet.  Whatever.  Just do it and stop waiting and whining about the federal government ignoring Tennessee.

If you are not a Tea Partier and don't agree with those beliefs--if you think the federal government has a role in situations like this--and have always, consistently felt that way this message is not for you.  Most people, no matter their political leanings, don't ever take their thoughts and beliefs to their logical conclusion.  If there's one thing I can thank Dr. Hall from Belmont for its making me think through all of my beliefs to the most extreme end and seeing if I still like where they took me.  Liberals often don't think through what extreme tolerance leads to.  Or banning smoking, fatty foods or salt.  Both sides are guilty of this.  Consevatives and Tea Party supporters must now think through to the extreme end of their beliefs--to have a disaster in their own lives and whether or not they want federal assistance.  To rebuild on our own, or not.  I'm not saying who's right or who's wrong.  I know some people have no where else to turn and am not faulting them for taking federal aid.  But if they take federal aid, and have to this point been against it, they MUST change their views from here on out.  Period.

Sometimes standing up for our beliefs causes great hardship and sacrifice, and that lesson was first taught to us by Christ.  If your belief is such that it is worth having, it is worth having at any and all costs.  If it isn't worth having at the cost you are facing then that is fine.  It is a test of how strongly you believe something versus how easy it is to take a position when what you are advocating for has no direct bearing on your life.  Now is the time to decide. 

 

Dry Land

Sunday afternoon I went down to the beach for about an hour.  The wind was crazy, it was chilly and foggy.  There was no one else on the beach which was perfect for me.  I just needed a few minutes to relax and mentally deal with the mess that was going on back home in Nashville.  When it comes to finding a relaxing place where I can see the works of God a secluded beach can't be beat, no matter the weather.  I had just spent an hour at the condo crying while Kirby was at the store.  We couldn't get home but I needed to get out of that room. 

I was watching the seagulls and other birds dive down into the water, despite it being choppy and rough as hell.  I looked up at the birds and thought, "How do they even fly in this wind?"  Bingo.  How do those birds fly against 30mph winds?  Because God made them to be able.  Then I looked down at the tide that was rolling in closer and closer to my chair--there was probably 15 feet of beach left with the tide coming in so far.  I scooted my things back about 5 feet.  The waves just kept coming.  The sand in Destin is some of the most beautiful in the world.  White, soft, perfect.  It took thousands of years to create that perfect sand and beautiful beach.  Even on a gloomy, cold, windy, foggy day it was beautiful.  It was different than I'd ever seen that beach and if you had spent good money to be there for vacation it would tend to be depressing.  But it was relaxing and beautiful to me.

I went back to the condo and we went to dinner, not knowing if that was going to be the last few hours of relaxation we'd get for a while.  It wasn't very relaxing, but we still had a good time.  We got back to the condo and did some laundry, packed up and watched the coverage on TV and online.  We couldn't stop looking at pictures, and we didn't want to talk about what our options were when we got home.  On the one hand we wanted to be prepared for whatever we found when we came home but we also didn't want to needlessly worry.  From what we were seeing in pictures and the last report we got from the shop earlier that morning, though, there wasn't much to be optimistic about.  I spent most of the night wrapped up in a blanket on the patio just praying.

I've found in my experience that in the times where I am afraid and uncertain is when I get the most clarity.  It pushes you to think about all the things you don't want to.  I had started to grow tired and frustrated with work and all the challenges we'd had so far this year, although in the last two weeks things were beginning to look better.  I always thought my home would be the most important thing to me, but then I started thinking about just where we'd be without the shop.  We both work there.  ALL of our money and savings and credit is tied up there.  We have three other employees with wives and children to support.  Even knowing that so many others in Nashville would be in the same situation as we would didn't help.  We would have literally been out of business.  The long nights and hard work would have been for nothing.  All the time fixing up the new building would have gone down the drain.  We would have literally lost everything, including possibly our home eventually without an income to make the payments.  Losing the shop WAS a bigger deal than losing our home.  We have family here to stay with.  Nothing in our home couldn't be replaced over time, with little effort.  Try replacing a $3500 lift that we got for $700 at an auction, or a $15,000 custom built engine.

At 8:00 this morning my parents called.  They had gotten to the shop.  Neither one had wanted to go but knew they needed to.  They didn't want to see what was likely waiting for them, either.  My Dad stood to loose thousands of dollars, too, on the car of his that we are working on.  I was in the shower while Kirby talked to Dad.  I could hear bits and pieces of the conversation and I knew the news was good news.  Better than good.  I honestly don't have the words to describe how greatful we are and how amazed we are at the outcome.  Our neighbors at the shop were gutting their building today after taking on 2 feet of water.  Our parking lot is destroyed from the raging river that was flowing in front of it less than 24 hours ago.  The only thing we lost?  A box of business cards that were sitting on the floor in a closet.  Even the wood chest that Kirby's grandfather built trunk, full of old pictures and an irreplaceable newspaper article about his late grandfather survived unscathed. 

It is nothing short of a miracle.  Thanks be to God for saving us, both our business and our house!  Thanks to the Big Guy, also, for keeping the rest of our family here safe and mostly dry!  The damage to Kirby's sister's house was minimal, all things considered and they remained safe even though they could not get out of their neighborhood.  Thanks for opening our eyes to all we have, and still have, and would have still had even if the worst had happened.  One of the best parts of marriage is that you have each other--in the good times as well as the bad.  Sort of fitting that we were out of town for a wedding, celebrating the union of two people who truly love and support each other, while at the same time were able to test and stregnthen our vows trhough this great challenge.  Many thanks to my parents as well, and Tommy, who came out this morning and took care of everything that did need to be cleaned up by lunch time today and got the shop back on its feet and rolling.  Tommy even worked on the cars this afternoon!  God is truly great, and next time I feel challenged I'll remember the seagulls and why they can fly in that wind.

The Waters

I'm sitting on the patio in Destin, drinking a banana milkshake, listening to the wind in the palm trees and that sound of the ocean.  On the one hand I'm glad we got our full stay in Florida.  And I'm glad we weren't actually in Nashville to witness the mess developing firsthand.  On the other hand I'm extremely nervous about going back tomorrow and what we'll find.

I know for a fact our house is safe.  Rocky is with my parents and they are also safe.  But from what we've seen on TV and online today we can only assume that the shop flooded.  I hope we are wrong, or that there's not much water in there.  Regardless of the condition of the shop we won't make the show now.  And as much as I love my house, I'd much rather it be our house that was damaged than our shop.  We have other places to stay.  Nothing in my house isn't reletively easy to replace.  Our house does not generate our income and pay our bills.  It is the bills. 

I'm concerend for the people who did lose their homes and belongings, some of my family included in that group.  Our employees, too.  But without our shop, we really have nothing.  We've worked so hard over the last three years to build this business from nothing and had finally gotten to a place where things were rolling along well.  We were about to debut our premier car at one of the biggest shows in the Southeast.  Now we won't make that show.  We have no idea what shape our building is in, if any equipment is damaged.  Not knowing is the worst part right now for sure.  Business will be down, I'm sure, which is understandable.  It is entirely possible that life as Kirby and I know it is forever changed.

I'm still sort of glad that I'm here right now, not having to face it all yet.  That's going to be one long drive home tomorrow, though, not knowing what we are going home to or even if we can get to our house yet.  But I want to be home.  I miss my Rock, and when you cuddle up with him he takes all the sads away.  We have our lives, our families, each other and the Rock.  We'll be OK.